• Home
  • Latest
  • Fortune 500
  • Finance
  • Tech
  • Leadership
  • Lifestyle
  • Rankings
  • Multimedia

Trendingnow

1

MacKenzie Scott alone accounted for one-third of America's $19.2 billion in megagifts last year

2

As Big Tech showers employees with perks to win the talent war, Nvidia built a nearly $5 trillion company by making people pay for their own lunch

3

Philanthropy leader at Warren Buffett and Bill Gates’ Giving Pledge says children of billionaires are pushing them to give their wealth away faster

1

MacKenzie Scott alone accounted for one-third of America's $19.2 billion in megagifts last year

2

As Big Tech showers employees with perks to win the talent war, Nvidia built a nearly $5 trillion company by making people pay for their own lunch

3

Philanthropy leader at Warren Buffett and Bill Gates’ Giving Pledge says children of billionaires are pushing them to give their wealth away faster
Commentary

Why You Need to Stop Asking People to Be Your Mentor

By
Kim Metcalf-Kupres
Kim Metcalf-Kupres
Down Arrow Button Icon
By
Kim Metcalf-Kupres
Kim Metcalf-Kupres
Down Arrow Button Icon
March 26, 2016, 11:00 AM ET
493816419
Creative coworkers doing high five at the officePhotograph by Klaus Vedfelt via Getty Images
Add Fortune on Google for similar content.

MPW Insider is an online community where the biggest names in business and beyond answer timely career and leadership questions. Today’s answer for: How do you find a mentor? is written by Kim Metcalf-Kupres, CMO of Johnson Controls.

When done well, mentoring relationships can be a tremendous asset for personal and professional growth, but finding someone to help you navigate your career path is not always easy. Below are the four best pieces of advice that I can offer anyone seeking a mentor:

Start with a clear understanding of your objectives
In my experience, most people who say they want a mentor don’t really know what they want. Before seeking a mentor, develop a clear sense of your goals and objectives: What is your ambition? Where is there room for development? What are you hoping a mentor will do for you? Without this clarity, you will waste your time and theirs.

Make it easy for people to help you
Open-ended requests to “be my mentor” can seem overwhelming and put too much pressure on a potential mentor to formalize and drive the relationship. A better approach is to not even use the word “mentor”. Instead, seek out trusted advisors and initiate engagements by simply asking for help or advice: Would you be willing to help me understand the monthly financial statements? I admire your professional presence, would you be willing to give me some advice on how to enhance my own presence? These are the types of questions potential mentors are more likely to respond to with enthusiasm and helpful insights. They’re tangible discussion topics that can be separately addressed in relatively short amounts of time. This makes it easier for people to help you and provides an opportunity to build a relationship over time.

See also: Here’s Why It’s So Hard to Find a Good Mentor

Don’t rely on labels
Life is full of “mentors”. Open yourself to that possibility and be willing to accept help and counsel from those around you. They’re literally everywhere. One of my first mentors was my high school debate coach. I never asked her to be my mentor, but the skills and experiences she helped me acquire are integral to who I am today, and have compounded over the years to contribute to my professional success. Also, remember that everyone has different skills and experiences. Don’t expect one person to be able to address everything. Instead, cultivate a network of people you admire and can consult on many dimensions. Ultimately, the benefit of these external insights is up to you.

Cultivate sponsors
A mentor is someone who can give you advice that — depending on what you do with it — can help you learn and grow. A sponsor, however, is someone who can not only give advice, but also believes in you enough to advocate for you when it comes to real opportunities — a job, a promotion, or a referral. Meaningful sponsor relationships require trust, focus and commitment on both sides, but are always worth the effort.

About the Author
By Kim Metcalf-Kupres
See full bioRight Arrow Button Icon
Add Fortune on Google for similar content.

Latest in Commentary

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025

Most Popular

Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Finance
Lorem ipsum dolor sit amet, consectetur adipiscing elit, sed do eiusmod tempor incididunt ut labore et dolore magna aliqua. Ut enim ad minim veniam
By Fortune Editors
October 20, 2025
Fortune Secondary Logo
Rankings
  • 100 Best Companies
  • Fortune 500
  • Global 500
  • Fortune 500 Europe
  • Most Powerful Women
  • World's Most Admired Companies
  • See All Rankings
  • Lists Calendar
Sections
  • Finance
  • Fortune Crypto
  • Features
  • Leadership
  • Health
  • Commentary
  • Success
  • Retail
  • Mpw
  • Tech
  • Lifestyle
  • CEO Initiative
  • Asia
  • Politics
  • Conferences
  • Europe
  • Newsletters
  • Personal Finance
  • Environment
  • Magazine
  • Education
Customer Support
  • Frequently Asked Questions
  • Customer Service Portal
  • Privacy Policy
  • Terms Of Use
  • Single Issues For Purchase
  • International Print
Commercial Services
  • Advertising
  • Fortune Brand Studio
  • Fortune Analytics
  • Fortune Conferences
  • Business Development
  • Group Subscriptions
About Us
  • About Us
  • Press Center
  • Work At Fortune
  • Terms And Conditions
  • Site Map
  • About Us
  • Press Center
  • Work At Fortune
  • Terms And Conditions
  • Site Map
  • Facebook icon
  • Twitter icon
  • LinkedIn icon
  • Instagram icon
  • Pinterest icon

Latest in Commentary

senate
CommentaryCongress
One rare bipartisan AI bill is moving through Congress. Here’s why it deserves to pass
By Neil Björkman and Betsy BrewerJuly 1, 2026
10 hours ago
I know how Gen Z can survive the ‘jobpocalypse’ because I built an AI company — in 2015
CommentaryCareers
I know how Gen Z can survive the ‘jobpocalypse’ because I built an AI company — in 2015
By Jeremy FainJuly 1, 2026
11 hours ago
mr
Commentary250 Years of Innovation
America needs 3.8 million manufacturing workers. This CEO has a blueprint to find them
By Mark RayfieldJuly 1, 2026
11 hours ago
usa
Commentary250 Years of Innovation
America at 250: why the Constitution was built to restrain government, not celebrate majority rule
By Steve H. HankeJuly 1, 2026
11 hours ago
t
CommentaryMedia
Netflix could turn NBC into its biggest bet yet — and this time, the math actually works
By Jeffrey Sonnenfeld and Steven TianJune 30, 2026
1 day ago
wb
CommentaryLeadership
I grew BDO from $600 million to $3.4 billion. Here’s the 3-part formula that made it possible
By Wayne BersonJune 30, 2026
1 day ago

Most Popular

MacKenzie Scott alone accounted for one-third of America's $19.2 billion in megagifts last year
Success
MacKenzie Scott alone accounted for one-third of America's $19.2 billion in megagifts last year
By Sydney LakeJune 25, 2026
7 days ago
As Big Tech showers employees with perks to win the talent war, Nvidia built a nearly $5 trillion company by making people pay for their own lunch
Big Tech
As Big Tech showers employees with perks to win the talent war, Nvidia built a nearly $5 trillion company by making people pay for their own lunch
By Marco Quiroz-GutierrezJuly 1, 2026
14 hours ago
Philanthropy leader at Warren Buffett and Bill Gates’ Giving Pledge says children of billionaires are pushing them to give their wealth away faster
Success
Philanthropy leader at Warren Buffett and Bill Gates’ Giving Pledge says children of billionaires are pushing them to give their wealth away faster
By Preston ForeJune 27, 2026
4 days ago
Elon Musk on MacKenzie Scott giving away $26 billion of her fortune: 'Sadly,' it makes the world a worse place
Success
Elon Musk on MacKenzie Scott giving away $26 billion of her fortune: 'Sadly,' it makes the world a worse place
By Sydney LakeJune 29, 2026
2 days ago
The Supreme Court's birthright citizenship ruling hands the U.S. economy a $7.7 trillion win
Newsletters
The Supreme Court's birthright citizenship ruling hands the U.S. economy a $7.7 trillion win
By Diane BradyJuly 1, 2026
12 hours ago
The U.S. Army is opening military bases to private billions — here's why that changes everything for the next 250 years
Commentary
The U.S. Army is opening military bases to private billions — here's why that changes everything for the next 250 years
By Marc AndersenJune 30, 2026
1 day ago

© 2026 Fortune Media IP Limited. All Rights Reserved. Use of this site constitutes acceptance of our Terms of Use and Privacy Policy | CA Notice at Collection and Privacy Notice | Do Not Sell/Share My Personal Information
FORTUNE is a trademark of Fortune Media IP Limited, registered in the U.S. and other countries. FORTUNE may receive compensation for some links to products and services on this website. Offers may be subject to change without notice.